How to Tell if a Tinder Conversation is Going Well: Key Tips
Matching with an exciting new person is only step one. After that, you have to deal with the stress of continuing the conversation and wondering if a Tinder match is interested.
It can be hard to tell if your Tinder conversation is going well. Use this guide to determine if yours is heading towards date territory, why some Tinder conversations die out, and how to enhance any convo.
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How to Know if a Tinder Conversation is Going Well
Even Tinder pros have trouble judging whether a conversation is going well. However, there are a few things you can look out for to determine if the conversation is successful and if a Tinder match is interested in you.
Responding in a Timely Fashion
Think about how you act when you have an exciting match. When you’re eager to talk to someone, you usually respond in a timely fashion, rather than taking days – or a year like this person!

When a Tinder match takes forever to respond, it might be time to get back to swiping.
I always recommend responding to a match you’re interested in sooner rather than later. This is especially important at the beginning of the courting process. Chances are, they have other people messaging them, so you want to stay at the top of their DMs. You should be responding to your match’s messages within 24 hours or less.
If your match is taking more than 24 hours to reply to your messages, they are either busy, uninterested, or not serious about getting to know you better. That’s why it’s important to have multiple leads since it’s common for people to ignore or ghost you when it comes to online dating.
Sending Messages Longer than One Word
Like a fast response time, a good sign that your Tinder conversation is going great is when you both send messages longer than one word. Be wary of chats like:
- “I’m good, hbu?”
- “That sounds cool.”
- “Nice!”
A flourishing conversation will have messages like “I’m good, I just had a fun hangout with my friend! How are you doing today?”
Therefore, I always recommend spending some time looking at your Tinder match’s profile and bio to find common interests and topics to discuss. This allows you to ask more personalized questions and provide more thoughtful answers to their replies. Have a genuine interest in each of your matches and aim to get to know them on a deeper level.
For example, if you notice they enjoy hiking and travel, you could ask about their favorite hiking trail or a memorable travel experience they’ve had. Another approach could be noticing they mention a favorite book or movie in their bio. You could ask them what they liked most about it or if they have any other recommendations in that genre.
Here’s an easy checklist to create a Tinder profile that stands out.
Taking Things Off the Dating App
Unsurprisingly, the best sign that your Tinder conversation is going well is that things go off the app. In other words, if you or your match asks to have a Facetime or IRL date and the other says yes, it’s a promising sign.
Try and find a clever way to ask for your match’s number like this guy!

I always recommend asking out your match within 3 days after matching with them on Tinder or another dating platform. The reason for this is that it allows you to progress your relationship and reduce the disruption from other potential matches they might be getting replies from. You can ask for their phone number, WhatsApp, or even Facebook or Instagram.
However, I recommend trying to get their number or WhatsApp, as it is more personal than chatting with them on a social media platform. You can easily word this by asking something like, ‘I really like talking to you! I don’t go on here too often, but I would love to continue this convo off the platform. Do you use WhatsApp?’
If you’re tired of being ghosted and not getting replies, check out my Complete Online Dating Guide to improve your chances of finding meaningful connections.
How Do Most Tinder Conversations Go?
The truth is, many Tinder conversations go nowhere. Life can get in the way, people get busy, and it’s hard to keep in touch online. However, if you use dating strategies with your Tinder conversations, you have a much better chance of a successful Tinder conversation and winning a first date.

Even though these two Tinder matches are getting along, life gets in the way and prevents the conversation from flowing. Who knows – maybe they’ll finally meet for a date after this.
Why do Tinder conversations go nowhere?
If the conversation fizzles out, don’t immediately blame yourself. Let’s take a look at some of the reasons why your Tinder convo might end sooner than you’d like.
They’re Busy
We all have busy lives! Sometimes work gets in the way, or a match may go through a stressful week. In those cases, your conversation may dwindle to a halt. But, that doesn’t mean it can’t be reinvigorated.
If you want to restart a dying conversation, try going with a line like:
- Hey! I know you’ve been busy, any chance you’re free for a call this week?
- It’s been a crazy month for me, I’m sorry we haven’t gotten a chance to connect! How’s work going?
Keep in mind that people are often busy for many reasons that may have nothing to do with you. They could be working overtime, dealing with exams, handling a family emergency, or a hundred other reasons. Therefore, don’t blame yourself if you find a match not responding to your Tinder opener.
Are you attractive but not getting enough matches? Find out why!
It’s Hard to Keep in Touch Online
It can be challenging to remember to respond to friends and family, let alone someone you don’t have a real-life relationship with yet. When life gets busy, the first conversations to suffer are online ones.

You can try to avoid this by responding to your match in a timely fashion and moving things off the app as soon as possible. As mentioned, responding sooner rather than later is the best way to stay at the top of your match’s mind.
Asking interesting open-ended questions and making unique statements go a long way to keep your match engaged. For example, if your match mentions they love traveling, you could ask them about their favorite destination and why it holds a special place in their heart.
If you’re having trouble getting your match to respond, don’t take it too hard. If you like your match, I recommend following up at least three times before giving up. If you’ve followed up three times and they haven’t responded to your DMs, it’s a clear sign they are not interested or serious.
Sometimes the Chemistry Isn’t There
A lack of chemistry isn’t a sign that you’re not a great Tinder match. But if the conversation isn’t flowing easily, there’s no common interest, laughter, compliments, physical attraction, or hints of deeper connection, many people are quick to jump ship.

See how these two have “chemistry?” All jokes aside, this conversation is a great example of two people who already get along well online. If that’s missing in a Tinder conversation, it’s okay to move on to the next match.
If there is a lack of chemistry between you and your match, that’s fine. It’s normal! The goal of online dating is to determine if there is any chemistry between you and your match as soon as possible, so you can decide whether it’s worth pursuing further or not. If there is chemistry, great! You can try to ask for their number and meet up with them in person if you feel there is potential. If there isn’t chemistry, you should know sooner rather than later to save time and avoid investing in a relationship where chemistry is lacking.
How to Keep a Conversation Going on Tinder
The easiest ways to continue a Tinder conversation are to make connections, find similarities, and put in some effort. If your match can tell you’re uninterested, they’re not going to keep the conversation going. Try these:
- How is your day going? Mine got off to a rough start, but things are going much better now that I’m chatting with you!
- Are you a fan of superhero movies? I’m going to see the new Marvel after work today!
- What’s your favorite type of food? I’ve been trying to find spots around town so I’m looking for recommendations!
Let’s explore some more specific Tinder chat tips and advice to keep your conversations flowing.
How Do You Make a Conversation Interesting on Tinder?
Here are a few of my online dating tips to keep things exciting, and therefore keep your new Tinder match interested:
1. Employ Good Tinder Conversation Starters
Starting a Tinder conversation on the right foot is essential for keeping things fresh and interesting for your match. Therefore, your Tinder opener, or good conversation starter, is critical to setting a positive tone, making a good first impression, and capturing their interest with your first move or cheesy pickup line. Opting for a quirky joke, an intriguing question, or a thoughtful connection are proven ways to get the conversation started on a strong note, whether you’re aiming for a flirty message or a deeper connection.
- Quirky Observation: “Do you ever wonder if pizza is the only thing holding us all together?”
- Creative Question: “If you could teleport anywhere right now, where would you go and why?”
- Personalized Compliment: “Your bio mentions you love hiking. What’s the most breathtaking trail you’ve ever conquered?”
- Playful Challenge: “Let’s settle this: pineapple on pizza—delicious or sacrilegious?”
- Pop Culture Twist: “If you were a character from ‘Friends,’ who would you be and why?”

As you can tell from the conversation above, the opening question allowed his match to think of an answer that is both vulnerable and unique. Now he can follow up and ask her what she cries about.
If you’re having trouble with your text conversations, check out my personalized dating app texting feedback. I’ll work with you to fix your bottlenecks, come up with engaging openers, and improve your success on dating apps.
2. Show Your Personality
Showing your personality is just as important as starting the conversation well. Letting your match get to know the real you will keep things fresh and interesting. Here are some ways to do that:
- Sharing Your Quirks: “I’m a firm believer that ice cream is a suitable breakfast option. What’s your guilty pleasure?”
- Asking about Hobbies: “I noticed you’re into photography. What’s your favorite subject to capture?”
- Discussing Interests: “I recently got into hiking and I’m hooked! What’s your go-to outdoor activity?”
- Expressing Curiosity: “If you could learn any skill overnight, what would it be and why?”
- Casual Humor: “They say laughter is the best medicine. What’s the last thing that made you laugh uncontrollably?”

In the example above, one person is trying to ask questions, but no one is truly showing their personality. The match could give more info about themselves besides just saying their job title and how long they’ve worked there. For example, they can ask the other person what they do for work.
The person’s icebreaker could have been better too. Instead of just asking about their weekend, their first message could have sparked more curiosity or humor to grab attention right from the start. For example, they could have shared an amusing anecdote about their weekend adventures or asked a quirky question related to common interests.
3. Ask Thoughtful Questions
The best questions to ask on Tinder are a mix of thoughtful and funny inquiries that delve into their passions and demonstrate genuine interest. Try something like:”
- What’s your perfect first date?
- Would you rather never eat burgers again or have to eat a burger for every meal?
- Name three things on your bucket list – I’ll go first!
- What’s your favorite place you’ve ever visited and why?
- If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be and why?
The key when asking good Tinder questions is to make them unique, interesting, and relevant. As mentioned, spend some time reading your matches’ profiles and looking for themes and topics you can talk about. For example, if they mention a love for cooking in their bio, ask about their signature dish or favorite cuisine.
How Do I Stop Being Boring on Tinder?
To make sure you’re not boring your matches, there are two things to keep in mind. First, stop sending one-word or simple answers. And second, don’t be afraid to be yourself.
No more one-word answers
Short responses never get action on Tinder. Think about it – if you were talking to someone in real life and they only answered in short sentences, wouldn’t you be bored? Conversations thrive on engagement and emotional response, so adding depth and interest to your messages can make all the difference.
Go for longer, thoughtful answers that keep things interesting, unlike the dull match below.

As you can see from the conversation above, one person is asking all the questions, and the other is responding with one-word answers. This type of interaction can hinder conversation flow. It’s important to pick up on cues and actively engage to keep the conversation interesting and dynamic.
Don’t be afraid to be yourself
Letting a Tinder match get to know you will show them how exciting you are. Unless you have no hobbies, no interests, and like to read a dictionary for fun, you’re not boring. Show them that by sharing about yourself and finding connections.

See how both people in that conversation showed their personalities? They were honest, open, and funny – and it led to an instant connection.
How Do I Revive a Dying Tinder Conversation?
So you thought a Tinder conversation was going well, but now it’s slowly dying. Don’t give up hope just yet!

This conversation shows two people who are both in on the joke of not having time for Tinder messages. It’s funny now, but eventually one of them will have to step up and reply on time so they can get to know each other. Otherwise, they’ll never meet and this humorous exchange will be a waste of time for both people.
There are tons of ways you can revive a dying conversation. Try some of these strategies to pick things back up.
Pick something out from a past conversation:
- I remember you said you love to hike, have you been to any cool places recently? I’ve been wanting to go while the weather is nice.
- How’s work been going? Have things calmed down since that crazy week?
Ask them something exciting:
- When was the last time you tried something new?
- If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?
- What’s the most adrenaline-filled activity you’ve ever done?
Also, don’t forget to add some flirting to your conversations to keep them fresh. Here are some flirty questions to ask on Tinder:
- What’s your idea of a perfect date?
- If we were to go out tonight, where would you take me?
- Do you believe in love at first swipe?
- What’s the first thing that attracted you to my profile?
- If we could skip the small talk and go straight to one activity together, what would it be?
Send a silly joke, gif, or story
Find a gif online that reintroduces yourself or makes them laugh. Or, tell them a joke or story from your life to keep things light and bring them back in!

Besides GIFs, asking funny questions or making statements is a great way to add humor and keep your conversations light-hearted. Here are some funny questions to ask on Tinder:
- If you were a vegetable, which one would you be and why?
- What’s your weirdest talent that you don’t put on your resume?
- If you could only eat one dish for the rest of your life, what would it be? (Hint: “pizza” is a valid answer!)
- What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve done on a date?
- If animals could talk, which one do you think would be the rudest?
These questions can help break the ice and add a playful tone to your Tinder chats!
Get the Best Advice from a Professional in the Online Dating World
The best way to learn about successful Tinder conversations and move things forward with matches is to consult with a professional who can provide good conversation starters and advice.
As an online dating expert, I offer personalized coaching, professional dating profile writing, and guidance on improving your dating life to score more matches, dates, and replies across various platforms.