Should I Ask Her Out Again If She Said She Was Busy?

Should I Ask Her Out Again If She Said She Was Busy?

Occasionally, someone will toss you a curveball. When things seem to be going well, it’s wise to be on your guard. Netizens, as well as individuals who frequent sites like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble, to name a few, are notoriously fickle.

For example, you may have established a rapport with a match online. The banter flows freely between the two of you, and it seems that – if you play your cards right – you might get a chance to ask them out. However, when you finally do, they hit you with the age-old excuse, ‘I’m busy.’ How should you respond? And should you ask her out again if she said she was busy? Let’s find out!

Should I Ask Her Out Again if She Said She Was Busy?

Man with beard in turtleneck sitting by a window in a cafe, checking his phone.


Although it can seem as though all is lost when a girl says that she is busy, there are a few things that you should consider before throwing in the towel. The “I’m busy” excuse may be just an excuse or it could be the truth. By examining your earlier conversations, you can find out which one it is, and adjust your response accordingly.

In this post, we are gonna teach you how to discern between one and the other based on various cues. We will also show you how you can and should respond to messages like this, so keep reading to up your game.

What Does it Mean When a Girl Says That She is Busy?

What does it mean when a girl says that she is busy?


When a girl says that she is busy, it could mean a variety of different things. Knowing which applies to your specific situation will inform you how best to approach the girl in question.

She Is Not Interested

If a girl says that she is busy, it could be a polite way of rejecting your advances. Of course, none of us wanna hear this, but it is still essential to understand: people online are frivolous – they will often keep chatting to you out of boredom or sympathy, with no real intention of ever going out with you.

Naturally, your first instinct may be to look inward. Look through your chat to see if you said something wrong or offensive. If you did, the chances are it was a big turn-off for the other person.

In this case, damage control is possible, but your effort would probably be better spent elsewhere. However, what is more likely is that the other person was never interested at all. Look through your chat again and take note of how they reply. If their responses are short and disinterested, it’s a good sign that “I’m busy” is a euphemism for “I’m not interested.”

She Has Found Someone Else

The world of online dating moves quickly, so you need to be even quicker. Although it may seem better to get to know someone as much as possible before meeting them, the energy it takes to do this should be conserved.

Instead, it would be best if you focused on building a rapport as quickly as possible to ask them out within at least three days of speaking to them.

If you are new to online dating, however, you may have made the mistake of taking too long to make a move. Your conversations may have started sweet, and you may have also enjoyed some banter. After a while, though, you may have noticed a dip in the quality of conversations.

Although you may have said something wrong (see above), it is more likely that the person you have been speaking to has met someone else and may have already gone on a date with them. Their reluctance to engage in conversation – when before they were eager to speak to you – may signify that they want to pursue a relationship with someone else.

In this case, “I’m busy” is an excuse, especially if they make no further attempts at conversation afterward.

She’s Unsure

Not every online dater is familiar with all the rules you should be following. Although we recommend asking someone out within three days of first speaking to them, some may prefer to take a little longer before agreeing to meet.

These people may seem like tough shells to crack, but as long as you keep up the quality of your conversations without putting too much pressure on them, they will come around eventually.

In this case, the person you are speaking to may be completely forthright about their hesitation. If they are not, make sure that they still engage in your conversations and participate in banter. If they do not, they may be saying “I’m busy” for one of the other reasons we have already covered.

She May Actually Be Busy

This last one should seem obvious, but it is entirely possible that when a girl says she is busy, she means it.

However, just because she says that she is busy does not mean that she is not interested. If you are wondering whether or not this is true, consider how well your conversations have been going. If they continue to go well, you should be safe to ask her out again soon.

The best indication of whether or not she is telling the truth is how she follows up. If she is interested, she will offer another date to see you. It is as cut and dry as that.

How to Respond When a Girl Says That She Has Plans?

How do you respond when a girl says that she is busy?


There are various ways in which you can respond to a girl when she says that she is busy. However, the best option would be to examine the exact circumstances under which she says that, then curate your response accordingly.

What to Say When She Says She Has Plans

You might be wondering, ‘What if I asked a girl out but she said she had plans?’ If a girl tells you that she already has plans, the best thing you can do is be amicable. If everything has been going well, there’s no reason to lose your cool and risk undoing everything you’ve built.

Firstly, you should wish her well, especially if she’s your crush. Tell her that you hope she enjoys herself. Whatever you say, please avoid this common mistake and do not ask what she will be doing or who she will see, as this may make you seem paranoid. She will share those details with you when you see each other if she wants to.

After that, suggest an alternative date to see her, such as a Saturday or Sunday afternoon. Be proactive and suggest a few places that you would like to go to and some activities that the two of you might enjoy together. It doesn’t have to be an expensive date. Casual, low-key settings such as a cafe, museum, or art gallery can provide an ideal backdrop for meaningful conversation, a relaxed atmosphere, and the opportunity to build attraction. Choosing a location that aligns with common interests can further enhance the experience. Remember, the goal is to create a comfortable setting where both of you can hang out and enjoy each other’s company without the pressure of a formal date.

Lastly, try to find out her schedule so that you can suggest dates and times that will accommodate her. If all goes well, she will agree to your plans. If not, simply let it be for the time being and focus your attention elsewhere. Again, do not be pushy, especially with your crush, as it’s essential to respect her boundaries and feelings.

When a Girl Says She Already Has Plans

When a Girl Says That She Cannot Make It

Being stood up is never pleasant, even if you have already built up immunity to it. Sometimes, a girl may agree to see you, only to cancel at the last second. Although being flaked on is never fun, it is a common occurrence in dating. When this scenario unfolds, don’t lose your cool, and remember it is not necessarily a bad sign.

Your crush may have provided a variety of excuses, such as an emergency situation or sickness. Similar to the situation we described previously, you should not put any pressure on her. Tell her that you hope she is alright and suggest rescheduling your date. If you sense hesitation or if it’s a bit too early for a direct date invite, you can frame it more casually as spending time together. It doesn’t have to be an expensive outing.

If she does not follow up with you after that, the chances are that she is not interested. Focus your attention elsewhere and move on. However, if she attempts to speak to you afterward, the chances are that she was telling the truth. At this point, you can suggest other dates to see her and gently inquire as to what happened when she stood you up.

When a Girl Says That She Cannot Make It

When a Girl Says Next Time

If you have asked a girl out and she says she will see you next time, you should put your foot on the brakes. It could be that you asked her out too soon, or she is not ready to commit to seeing you.

In either case, do not immediately ask when you can see her. Please give it a while, another three days perhaps, and make sure that your conversations still run smoothly. Keep her engaged by telling her about your day and sending funny photos or memes. If she still seems interested after these next three days, feel free to ask her out again.

When a Girl Says Next Time

How to Ask a Girl If She is Busy

Lady in sunglasses sitting outside on a sunny day, checking her smartphone.


We have touched on what to do if you asked a girl out, and she said she was busy, but often, it’s better to find a way to inquire about her availability before she tells you. Navigating the delicate balance of asking a girl out while respecting her busy schedule requires finesse.

If you are trying to figure out how to answer the question, ‘What do I do if a girl says she’s busy when I ask her out?’ it’s crucial to interpret her response with understanding. Instead of feeling discouraged, consider it an opportunity to showcase flexibility and genuine interest.

When broaching the subject, refrain from using the traditional word ‘date.’ This might be the most important thing you can do to avoid misunderstandings or bad experiences. Instead, suggest a casual outing or activity that aligns with her busy routine.

Acknowledge her hectic schedule and emphasize the importance of finding a time that suits her. Employing the word ‘date’ might add unnecessary pressure, so focus on creating easier access to your company.

Inquiring about her calendar without sounding intrusive demonstrates respect for her time. Busy people often appreciate the wisdom of someone who values their commitments. Share your understanding of busy schedules, express empathy based on bad experiences or witnessing it in others, and pay attention to any hints or clues, especially those that may surface during small talk, regarding her preferences.

Let her know you’ve been in similar situations plenty of times, assuring her that a simple, low-key gathering can be a refreshing break. Approaching the situation with sensitivity and flexibility may give you easier access and increase the chances of finding a suitable time that aligns with both your and her schedule.

Should I Ask Her Out Again If She Said No?


So, should you ask a girl out again after she mentioned being busy?” It’s crucial to approach the situation with careful consideration. Recognize that many girls lead busy lives, and understanding this is key to making an informed decision.

If she consistently appears to be unavailable, it might be worthwhile to explore the reasons behind her response. In situations where she consistently claims to be busy when you ask her out, emotions may run high, and you may find yourself questioning whether it’s worth pursuing her.

Consider factors such as whether she has a boyfriend or if there’s another influence on her behavior. While nobody wants to feel like just one of many buddies or friends, a simple movie invite can help clarify her intentions and dispel the mystery. If she declines again, it might be worth exploring other interests. The worst thing is clinging to false hope.

We understand it’s disappointing, but resist the urge to ask her the next day. Instead, give it a couple of weeks and observe her behavior. If she continues to be elusive, it’s crucial to recognize that disappointment is a part of dating. The day after a date invites potential rejection, try to gauge her level of attraction and interest, and decide if pursuing a romantic connection is genuinely worth the effort. Her actions should provide hints as to whether it’s still worth pursuing to build a relationship, such as a girlfriend or partner.

Final Thoughts

As you are probably aware, the dating game can be full of many challenges. However, with these suggestions and considerations in mind, you should have no trouble identifying a girl’s intentions when she says she is busy.

If you would like to improve your online social standing through dating apps, consider using our dating profile writing services for both men and women. Alternatively, if you think your conversational skills could use some honing, we also provide dating app texting feedback.

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