Dating, in general, can be a laborious affair, but online dating takes the amount of effort required to a whole new level. Simply put, if you want to be successful and maintain a healthy, steady relationship, you will have to put in the work.
This extends to the minutiae of conversation and how you interact with people. You cannot coast by on one-word messages alone, and both parties need to be equally engaged in every conversation you have.
Of course, this is complicated by various factors, all of which can grind a conversation to a halt – unless you come prepared with a handful of tips and tricks to keep the person you are texting thoroughly invested in both you and the conversation.
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How do you text a busy man?
The answer to “how should you text a busy man” is multifaceted. It is one that we are going to explore in-depth here, providing you with tips and tricks to keep a conversation going even when it seems like it has winded down and how to keep the person on the other side invested as well.
Your main goal is to avoid coming off as needy or demanding, but you also need to give your partner something to look forward to by being funny, sexy, and confident. In this way, your partner will stop trying to dodge your messages, and will instead actively look forward to all of your dates and interactions.
How to Respond When a Guy is Busy and Doesn’t Text You
If a guy doesn’t reply because he was busy, again, the best thing you can do is let him know that you understand. Do not pester him for information on what he was doing, or you will risk driving him away. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
Things to Avoid
There are a handful of things that you should avoid when texting a busy man. And while they may be easy for some, others may find themselves having to break a few habits to get it right.
Avoid Needy Messages
It is true what they say about most guys and neediness. They struggle to connect and engage with people who seem as though they constantly “need” the guy’s attention. Whether or not this is due to some inability to connect emotionally is a topic for another time, but being needy can quickly stop a potential conversation dead in its tracks.
Neediness is by no means a bad thing, and to some people, it is even an endearing quality. However, if your relationship is still young, you would do your best to avoid needy texting behavior. This includes spamming them with messages, constantly asking where they are or where they have been, and begging them to reply to you.
Avoid Generic Messages
During the early stages of a relationship, it is easy to trick yourself into believing that you have to remind your partner of your existence or else they will lose interest. While this mindset is understandable, it can often lead to you causing more harm than good.
For example, if you have nothing to say, then do not say anything. If your partner has told you that he is busy, respect that as much as possible, and do not start conversations that you know – deep down – will go nowhere. Things like, “Hey, what’s up,” and “How are you doing?” are generic and boring, and they can be annoying to put up with.
Instead, focus on the quality of your conversations rather than the quantity. You do not need to know every little detail of your partner’s day and vice versa. However, if something interesting has happened to you, or you have a legitimate question that you want to ask, you have a strong foundation upon which to build a truly engaging conversation.
Interesting and engaging topics can include your partner’s work, which will signal to them that you actually care about what they do.
If your partner has already told you that he is busy, try to keep what you want to say to yourself until an opportunity for conversation presents itself.
Avoid Long Messages
It could be that you have a great story to tell – your day was exciting, beginning with you missing the bus to work and having to walk to work, only to spill coffee on your boss, then later be promoted to a senior position at the company. It is tempting to want to share details like this immediately, not just with your partner but also with your friends and family.
However, it would be best if you resisted the urge to write a long message. More often than not, working people simply do not have a lot of time during their day to read one long message after another. Life moves too quickly for that.
Instead of transcribing a whole saga in your following WhatsApp message, simply let your partner know that you have something big you want to tell them or give them the briefest of brief synopses of the story. You can do this by asking them to speak later, and distilling down the major points in your story. Take note, however, that these kinds of stories are much better for in-person conversations.
Again, the aim is not to draw your partner’s attention negatively. The aim is to have significant, deep conversations that may form the basis of the rest of your relationship in the future. Besides, stories like that are best told in person anyway.
How to Respond When Someone Says They’ve Been Busy
When a guy tells you that he was busy, do not attack or harass him. Instead, let him know that you understand and that you are happy to be talking to him now. Here are a few things to do:
Things to Do
On the flip side, there are a couple of things that you can do when texting a busy man, if not to steal his attention away completely, then to keep him interested and invested in both you as a person and your relationship as a whole. If you can manage to implement these tips and tricks, we are confident that your man will be unable to resist you.
Be Comfortable With Not Speaking
This suggestion harkens back to the rule about neediness. In a nutshell, being comfortable with not speaking does not mean outright ignoring your partner even when they are not busy. It means being willing to spend time doing other things without feeling the need to check in with them every second.
It would be best if you stuck to your plans. If you also have to work, try to make the most of your time at the office. Do not spend all of your time on the phone. Or, if you have nothing pertinent to do, go out and explore, or do something that you have never done before, whether it is mundane or extraordinary.
Following this, do try to keep your partner in the loop. Let them know that you also have plans and cannot entertain a conversation all the time. We are sure that they will both respect and understand you, and it will make the moments when you do get to see each other or talk that much more special and refreshing.
Be Funny or Charming
We are taking this back to basics here and reminding you of some of the fundamental tips for online conversations. Although you may already be in a relationship with the man of your dreams, you should still put in the effort to be funny and charming.
Without harassing them while they are at work, the occasional funny text can be just the thing they need to get them through the day. A witty one-liner or musing is perfect because it does not necessarily have to lead to a full-blown conversation.
More often than not, guys will not reply because they cannot dedicate themselves to a lengthy chat. Still, a funny joke can allow them to respond with one of their own without any pressure of adding to or continuing the conversation.
There are plenty of solid, reliable funny one-liners that you can refer to, which are sure to put a smile on your partner’s face.
- Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
- Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.
- Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?
- There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn’t have your number in it.
- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together.
- Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Be Sexy and Confident
There is no doubt that confidence – in the correct dosage – is one of the most attractive qualities a person can have. Unfortunately, many people display plenty of confidence towards the beginning of a relationship, only for that quality to subside the longer the relationship continues.
Do not let this happen to you. Most likely, your confidence is what drew your partner towards you in the first place. It was not your body, eyes, or hair but your willingness to display them in all their beauty.
As a general rule of life, you should remember that you are beautiful. And when it comes to relationships, you should remind your partner that you are beautiful. Do not be afraid to send them a sexy picture or a flirtatious message now and then. They may be busy, but we can guarantee that they will respond to that.
Final Thoughts
Hopefully, this article has proven to be informative and affirming to you. Be sure to exercise the tips we have provided while keeping bad habits like neediness and spamming at bay.
If you are having trouble setting up your online dating profile, let us take a look and optimize it as best as possible, whether you are a man or a woman. Alternatively, if you find yourself struggling with conversations, we can provide comprehensive feedback on all of your text message interactions.